We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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