Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize
