She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I am one with the molecules
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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