Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
