He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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