Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
