You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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