No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize