I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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