how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
