You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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