Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I'm sobbing to NWA
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
