susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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