What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
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