Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
