He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
