He is an equal opportunity slut.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
