Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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