You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize