You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
