Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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