the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
