She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
