guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
