so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
