It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
