she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I will pee on everything he values.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
