if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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