I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Randomize
