sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
