I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
