I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
