Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
We had to coat check the pizza.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Come back. Shots need mouths.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
