need another drink. this is the easiest way
Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
