thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
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