I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
