I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
handjob tips. give me some.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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