he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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