i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
