going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Your cock deserves a montage
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
