You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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