just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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