I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
