I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
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