so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
