umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
This is the high leading the old right now
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
