It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Two words: blizzard sex
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize