Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
