I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
