Walk of Shame today included voting.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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