Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Randomize
