I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
